15 Sales Jokes to Brighten Up Your Day

4 years ago 2 minute read

When your sales team feels the pressure of hitting their quota or closing their current deal, they may forget why they chose the sales profession in the first place – it’s fun! Sometimes, they may need to reflect on this, and there is no better way than good sales jokes.

Sometimes we all need reminders that our jobs are fun and that this is just a bad day or a bad week. When I feel stressed out, I gather myself and remember some good advice I received: “Nobody dies in sales”. We are not heart surgeons or the armed forces where we have people’s lives at stake. Salespeople thrive on experimenting and having fun. This is not to say that sales jobs are always fun parties. It’s also not to say that high-pressure jobs aren’t fun and don’t have their rewards. We appreciate all of the people in high-pressure jobs from front line workers to the armed forces. 

In the business world, it can be easy to take yourself too seriously and forget to inject some humor and fun into your day job with some jokes. This is why we gathered some of the best sales jokes to bring some light to your day!

The Best Sales Jokes – Our Opinion

1. Light At The End Of The Tunnel

Sales jokes - Sales prospect asks for a call back in 6 months.... "So you're telling me there's a chance..."

2. What A Deal!

Salesperson: “This computer will cut your workload by 50%!”

Office Manager: “That’s great. I’ll take two!”

3. Those Are Rookie Numbers

4. See You Later, Alligator

“The salesperson claimed the shoes were made from alligator, but I knew it was a crock.”

5. I Couldn’t Turn Up

“I was fired from my job selling amplifiers because I didn’t achieve a sufficient volume of sales.”

6. Yes, Of Course, They Are!

Sales Jokes - When the receptionist asks if they're expecting your call

7. 30 Years Young!

Sales Jokes - Who said sales was stressful? I'm 32 and I feel great!

8. This Is Our USP

A salesman was demonstrating unbreakable combs in a department store. He was impressing the people who stopped by to look by putting the comb through all sorts of torture and stress.

Finally, to impress even the skeptics in the crowd, he bent the comb completely in half, and it snapped with a loud crack. Without missing a beat, he bravely held up both halves of the “unbreakable”comb for everyone to see and said, “And this, ladies and gentlemen, is what an unbreakable comb looks like on the inside.”

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9. To Do List

10.  It Can’t Always Be Both

“I love my sales job; it’s the work I hate.”

11. Tough Job

“I’m almost done making jokes about unemployed salespeople, but they still need some work.”

12. Progress!

Boss: Did you get any orders today? 

Salesperson: Yes, I got two! 

Boss: Congratulations! What were they?

Salesperson: “Get out!” and “Stay out!”

13. After 3 Demo Calls

sales jokes - What do you mean you're not the decision maker?

14. We Play Well Together

How do salespeople traditionally greet each other? 

“Hi. Nice to meet you. I’m better than you.”

15. The Prize Of The Century

“We are going to have a sales contest this month. The winners will get to enter next month’s contest.”

Hopefully, some of these sales jokes brightened your day! I had a few laughs myself looking them up for you. I know I won’t be able to get Jim Carry’s face out of my head when I come across those situations again. That may not be a bad thing, it will put a smile on my face when it happens. Don’t forget, enjoy your job – It’s a good one!

While you're here!

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Written by

Nick Hollinger | CEO

I am the CEO and Co-founder of Visitor Queue. Currently working with ~5000 companies across the globe including Microsoft and Jones Lang Lasalle. In my spare time, I am also the Game Day Director for one of Canada's most successful Junior Hockey Teams (the London Knights). Previously, I held Head of Marketing/Sales roles at SMB B2B organizations. A strong believer that hard work beats talent when talent doesn't work hard. I enjoy sharing my knowledge, experience, and opinion on Marketing, Sales, SaaS, and Entrepreneurship.